7 Common Motherhood Fears and How to Conquer Them | Simply Midori

December 4, 2023

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Being a mother can be one of life’s most rewarding and satisfying experiences. But it is also filled with its own unique set of worries, concerns, and fears. Whether you are a first-time mom or have experienced motherhood, it’s natural to feel uneasy about what lies ahead — both the joys and struggles of becoming a parent. What if I make the wrong decision? Will my child’s needs be met? These questions often arise even before your little bundle arrives! As daunting as they may seem, it’s important not to let these common fears take hold — instead, use them as an opportunity to find support and grow in confidence as an expecting mother. In this blog post, we will explore seven common fears many mothers face during pregnancy, how to identify them, and practical ways to cope with them so that you can embrace being an expectant mom without hesitation.

Fear #1: Will I be a good mother? 

Are you asking yourself, “Will I be a good mother?” You’re definitely not alone! We’ve all been there – feeling the excitement and anticipation of taking on this new role and the fear of the unknown. While none of us come into motherhood knowing exactly how to do it, the good news is that plenty of resources are available to help you make the most of this beautiful journey.

Gathering the Tools You Need

As a mother, you have an incredible opportunity to shape the life of another human being. It’s both a privilege and a great responsibility! To make sure you’re equipped with the necessary tools, here are a few resources that you can turn to:

  • Parenting blogs: You can find a wealth of advice and support from experienced parents who share their stories and tips on raising kids.

  • Books: From parenting manuals to humorous memoirs, there’s a wide range of literature available to help you navigate the parenting journey.

  • Online forums: Talking to other parents can be a great source of support and comfort. You can connect with people who understand the challenges and joys of motherhood.

  • Professional help: If you need extra guidance, you can always turn to a qualified professional. There are plenty of experts who specialize in helping families through the parenting process.

By arming yourself with the right resources, you can be sure that you’ll have the skills and knowledge to be the best mother you can be.

Fear #2 Will I have enough money?

It’s no secret that raising a child is incredibly expensive. The costs can quickly add up from diapers and clothes to food and daycare. But with careful planning and budgeting, you can ensure you’re somewhat prepared for your little one’s arrival.

How to Ensure You Have Enough Money for Your Little One’s Arrival:

Create a Budget

Creating a budget is crucial in guaranteeing you have enough money for your baby. List all necessary expenses, such as diapers, baby clothes, and formula. Then, use a budgeting app or spreadsheet to track your finances. That way, you can ensure you’re not overspending in any area.

Start a Savings Fund

Once you’ve created a budget, consider starting a savings fund specifically for your baby. This can be used to cover larger expenses, such as daycare or college tuition. Even small amounts can add up over time, so save as soon as possible.

Look for Savings Opportunities

Look for ways to save money regarding your baby’s needs. For example, you might consider buying gently used items or trading supplies with other families. You can also use coupons and take advantage of sales and discounts.

Get Financial Support

If you need additional financial support, there are resources available. Look into government programs such as the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) or Medicaid. You may also be eligible for tax credits or assistance from your employer.

Raising a child is a huge financial responsibility, but with meticulous planning and budgeting, you can feel prepared for the little one’s arrival. Start taking steps now to have enough money when the time comes.

Fear #3 Will I have enough time?

Having a baby can be an exciting and overwhelming experience. You may wonder if you’ll have enough time to care for your new little one while still managing to nurture your relationships with your spouse, friends, and family – and, if applicable, maintain your career.

The good news is that you can make it work with a little bit of planning. After all, millions of mothers around the world do it every day.

Juggling a Baby – How to Make it Work:

Set Priorities

Setting your priorities is the first step to striking a balance between your baby and other aspects of your life. Consider what is most important, and devote time to those areas. It may mean sacrificing time in other areas, but focusing on what truly matters is key.

Be Realistic

You may have grand ambitions for what you’d like to accomplish, but it’s paramount to be realistic about what you can achieve. Don’t be too hard on yourself if you can’t do it all. It’s okay to give yourself a break.

Accept Support

No one can do it all alone. Don’t be afraid to accept help from your spouse, family, friends, or community. Whether it’s your spouse taking the baby while you go out with friends or your mom coming over to watch the baby while you nap, accepting the help is integral when offered. You’ll be better equipped to handle the demands of parenting if you allow yourself some time to recharge.

Plan Ahead

Planning can go a long way in helping you balance your baby and other commitments. Map out your week and make sure you allocate enough time for everything you need to do. This will help ensure you stay on track and avoid feeling overwhelmed.

Be Flexible

In parenting, as in life, things don’t always go according to plan. There will be days when your baby needs more attention than usual, and your other commitments take up more time. When this happens, be flexible. Don’t beat yourself up if you can’t stick to the plan. Go with the flow and do the best you can.

Take Care of Yourself

Finally, don’t forget to take care of yourself. Make sure you get enough rest, work out, eat nutritious meals, and connect with friends or family. Taking care of yourself enables you to care for your baby and maintain your other commitments.

Fear #4 Will I be able to keep up with my partner? 

When you and your partner are expecting a new baby, worrying about how you’ll keep your relationship strong is normal. After all, adding a new family member is a huge change! But don’t worry; with a few simple steps, you can ensure you and your partner stay connected, even with the demands of parenthood. 

Want to Keep Your Relationship Strong After Baby? Here’s How:

Schedule Regular Dates

Set aside time each week when you and your partner can enjoy quality time together. This could be as simple as going for a walk or staying in and cooking dinner together. Having dedicated time to reconnect is essential. Set aside this time when you can be present and focused on each other. It can be easy to forget the importance of connecting with your partner once the baby arrives, so scheduling regular dates will help ensure you both stay connected.

Don’t Put the Relationship on the Back Burner

It’s natural to want to be a devoted parent; however, this can lead to neglecting your relationship with your partner. When you have a new baby in the house, prioritize your relationship. After all, having a solid connection with your partner will help you provide your child with a loving and stable home environment. So take a few moments daily to check in and focus on your relationship. Most importantly, don’t forget to communicate! Talk about your feelings, needs, and expectations to ensure your relationship doesn’t drift.

Fear #5 Will I be able to handle the pain?

Giving birth is likely one of the most intense experiences you’ll ever have. It is natural to be filled with anxiety, wondering if you have the strength and resilience to handle the pain. But remember – you’re a warrior and can do hard things.

We’ve all heard stories of the incredible strength and courage that women demonstrate during childbirth. Many women have a newfound appreciation for their bodies and the power they possess – and so can you!

How Can I Handle Giving Birth:

Focus On the Positive

  • Remind yourself of your goals. Having a clear focus can help you stay strong and motivated.

  • Bring a support system. Having people, you trust around you can make all the difference in the world.

  • Stay in the moment. Don’t focus on what could go wrong. Focus on what you can do right now to make the experience easier.

  • Accept that there will be pain. Pain is part of the process. Accepting it can help you manage it.

  • Stay hydrated. Make sure you are drinking lots and lots of water!

  • Be prepared. Talk to your doctor about pain relief options.

The journey of childbirth is unique to every woman, and no one can tell you what to expect. But you can take comfort in knowing that you are not alone. Women worldwide have gone through the same experience and come out stronger on the other side. Be proud of yourself and the strength you possess!

It may feel like you won’t be able to handle the pain, but you will be able to. Remember, you are strong and capable. Believe in yourself, and you can get through this. 

Fear #6 Will I be able to bond with my baby?

It’s normal to feel overwhelmed and unsure in the beginning. You’re taking on a big responsibility, and it’s only natural to feel daunting. But don’t worry – the bond between you and your baby will grow over time.

That special connection is something that takes time, but it will happen. The good news is that science has your back. Research shows that the bond between a parent and their baby develops in stages, beginning when you’re still expecting.

When Will I be Able to Connect with My Baby:

Stage One: Bonding During Pregnancy

A study from the University of Oxford showed a strong connection between a mother and her unborn baby. Through ultrasound scans, researchers observed that the baby would move in sync with the mother’s breathing and heartbeat- suggesting that babies are aware of and connected to their mother even before birth.

Stage Two: Bonding After Birth

Once your baby is born, you can create a concrete bond through simple moments like cuddles, reading, singing, and playing. Studies have found that the more time you spend interacting with your baby, the more your bond will develop.

Stage Three: Bonding Through the Years

The bond between you and your baby will grow as they age. Remember that your bond is unique and will look different from other parent-child relationships. It’s also important to try and stay connected as they grow up, as that connection will help them feel secure and loved.

So don’t worry if you feel overwhelmed initially; the bond between you and your baby will grow over time. You can create a strong and lasting connection with your little one with patience, love, and support.

Fear #7 Will I ever sleep again? 

Becoming a parent can indeed mean a few sleepless nights. But don’t despair – you won’t be stuck in a never-ending cycle of exhaustion! 

Here are a few tips to help you get the sleep you need:

  • Establish a consistent bedtime routine. A regular bedtime routine helps cue your body and your baby that it’s time to sleep. A consistent bedtime routine can help you, and your baby start winding down for the night. Give yourself time to relax, enjoy a warm bath, listen to calming music, or read a book. You’ll be surprised how much better you feel.

  • Take breaks during the day. Swapping off childcare duties with your partner, a grandparent, or a friend can help you get a few moments of relaxation.

  • Take advantage of naptime. When your baby naps, you should too! Even if it’s just for a few minutes, use this time to rest up and recharge. That extra sleep can make all the difference in how you feel throughout the day.

  • Prioritize sleep. This may seem counterintuitive, but prioritizing sleep can help you get the rest you need.

It can be hard to adjust to life with a new baby, but rest assured that you will get back on track with your sleep. With a bit of effort and a few helpful tips, you’ll be snoozing peacefully in no time.

Wrap Up

Becoming a parent isn’t an easy process. It can be overwhelming and full of fear. But despite all the worries that come with it, parenting should also be filled with love and joy. We hope we have been able to alleviate any fears you have that have arisen throughout this journey. While the questions are real, remember that your feelings and worries are valid, and you are never alone in facing them. Asking for help from your peers and even family members can make a world of difference when it comes to overcoming these fears. You don’t need to go through them on your own – let us know your fears and how we can help you overcome them together! Your parenting journey starts now – enjoy every step of this beautiful ride!

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