Unlock the Secrets to Deeper Physical Intimacy!

Intimacy is not solely physical or purely emotional. It’s a multi-dimensional concept that intricately weaves together all four facets of human nature: the physical; the intellectual; the emotional; and the spiritual. Hence, it becomes crucial to comprehend how intimacy influences and is influenced by these four aspects of our being.

In this blog post, we will delve deeper into the physical dimension of intimacy.

Why Physical Intimacy Is So Important?

Physical touch can powerfully communicate the emotional advantages of feeling loved and cared for. It also offers physiological benefits. One study revealed that partners who engaged in more physical contact, such as hugging or hand-holding, had decreased cortisol levels, which is a hormone linked to stress.

Elevated cortisol levels are known to raise heart rate and blood pressure. Researchers suggest that the positive emotions elicited by physical touch — feelings of satisfaction, relaxation, and attentiveness — contribute directly to the reduction of cortisol levels.

Another study discovered that individuals who experienced an increase in physically intimate behaviors over several days subsequently reported a decrease in symptoms of physical ailments, including muscle/back pain, headaches, insomnia, upset stomach, skin irritation, and sickness/injury.

A different study concluded that consistent and regular physical touch was associated with an increase in oxytocin (a hormone that promotes well-being and calmness), decreased cortisol levels for both partners, and reduced blood pressure among men.

Physical touch likely boosts well-being in all relationships. Non-sexual physical contact — such as hugging, squeezing, hand-holding, and casual touches — may serve as an effective method for sustaining intimacy and reaping its numerous benefits.

What is Physical Intimacy?

While physical intimacy and sexual intimacy are often linked, they are not the same thing. Physical intimacy refers to the act of touch and closeness between people, whereas sexual intimacy is a particular kind of physical intimacy that includes sexual activities. Physical intimacy isn’t exclusive to romantic relationships. It can also be integral to various other relationships, such as those between a parent and child, close friends, or family members.

Physical intimacy can be straightforward. It starts with a simple handshake, a friendly smile, or a peck on the cheek. However, physical intimacy can also be easily exploited. Skilled politicians are well aware of this; they dedicate their lives to shaking hands and kissing babies because they understand that even the smallest forms of physical intimacy can foster a sense of connection and belonging.

I’ve observed that individuals who excel at connecting with others during short interactions often use both hands while greeting. They might shake your hand with one hand, but they’ll also lightly touch your arm or shoulder with the other. This action adds an extra layer of closeness, even unity. If such a minor gesture can foster a sense of unity, imagine the profound level of unity experienced when two people engage in a sexual relationship.

Even years later, people still experience the pain and disorientation of the separation. Authentically, through the sexual act, two become one, and uniting is significantly easier than separating. Many have the sensation of disorientation after a sexual relationship has ended, but they are oblivious to the cause of this disorientation.

Recommended Reading: Should You Have Sex With Them?!?

Even after years, individuals can still feel the distress and confusion stemming from the separation. Through sex, two individuals merge into one, making the process of uniting vastly simpler than separating. Many people experience a feeling of disorientation after a sexual relationship has ended, often unaware of the root cause of this disorientation.

Having multiple sexual partners can intensify this sense of disorientation. With each sexual engagement, we leave a fragment of ourselves with the other person. This can lead to feeling drawn in different directions as if split in half, resulting in increased disorientation.

While it’s crucial to emphasize that sex doesn’t equate to intimacy, it’s equally important to acknowledge that our sexuality extends beyond just the physical. Despite claims from the latter part of the 20th century that we’ve thoroughly explored our sexuality, I believe we’re just scratching the surface of understanding the multifaceted effects sex has on us as humans. Our sexuality is a potent tool in our journey to become the best versions of ourselves; it can either propel us forward or hold us back, like many other aspects of life.

Recommended Reading: Rekindle the Spark: How to Overcome a Sexless Marriage

Life is about making choices. It’s also worth mentioning that all our relationships involve a physical element. Even in relationships solely through phone or online, you still engage your senses (speaking and listening or sitting, typing, and reading).

Some might argue that their relationship with God lacks a physical dimension. However, even this predominantly spiritual relationship has a physical side. Some people kneel to pray; others sit in a meditative posture; some raise their hands; others walk during their spiritual practices and rituals; and some lie flat for prayer. Our physical bodies are the mediums through which we experience everything in life.

What Are Examples of Physical Intimacy?

• Hugs

• Holding hands

• Dancing together

• Kissing (on the head, cheeks, lips, etc.)

• Cuddling

• Sleeping or napping together

• Backrubs

• Eye Gazing

• Massages

• Caressing Each Other

• Holding Hands

Physical intimacy typically develops as individuals become more comfortable with each other over time. It’s a common aspect of close friendships, serving as a way to convey emotional bonds and provide mutual support.

7 Signs Your Relationship Has Physical Intimacy: 

1. You Understand Your Needs (Click To Learn What His Needs & Her Needs Are)

2. You Utilize Touch as a Form of Communication

3. You Can Discuss It Openly

4. You Engage in Physical Contact Throughout the Day

5. Your Sexual Relationship is Satisfying

6. You Don’t Long for Physical Interaction

7. Your Physical Contact is Comfortable and Natural

12 Signs Your Relationship Lacks Physical Intimacy:

1. Decreased Physical Contact: The frequency of physical gestures like holding hands, hugging, or cuddling has drastically reduced.

2. Avoidance of Affection: Your partner consistently avoids or rejects your attempts at physical affection.

3. Lack of Sexual Desire: There’s a noticeable decrease in sexual desire or activity between you both.

4. Feeling Uncomfortable with Touch: If either of you feels uncomfortable with touch, it could be a sign of lacking physical intimacy.

5. Absence of Non-sexual Touch: If your relationship lacks non-sexual forms of touch like hand-holding, hugging, or caressing, it might lack physical intimacy.

6. No Eye Contact: Lack of eye contact during conversations can also signify a lack of emotional and physical intimacy.

7. Indifference to Physical Closeness: You or your partner seem indifferent to being physically close to each other.

8. Seeking Physical Comfort Elsewhere: If either of you is seeking physical comfort from others, it might indicate a lack of physical intimacy in your relationship.

9. Lack of Spontaneity in Physical Affection: The physical affection between you two feels forced or routine rather than spontaneous and genuine.

10. Physical Discomfort Around Each Other: If there’s a sense of discomfort when you’re in each other’s personal space, it may suggest a lack of physical intimacy.

11. Neglected Personal Appearance: If one or both partners start neglecting their personal appearance, it could be a sign of decreased physical attraction and intimacy.

12. Lack of Open Communication About Physical Needs: If discussions about physical needs or desires are avoided or end in arguments, it could indicate a lack of physical intimacy.

How Can You Develop Physical Intimacy Together?

Ease into showing affection gradually. If you’re not accustomed to expressing physical affection with your partner, don’t rush into it! This could lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings. Instead, develop your physical intimacy slowly, starting with small yet significant displays of affection and progressively moving towards more profound expressions of affection. Physical intimacy involves powerful emotions, so it’s important not to rush into intense forms until you’re comfortable with the less-intense ones.

Use hand-holding as a display of affection. While it may seem simple or even juvenile, holding hands is a wonderful and understated way to show affection, particularly in situations where more explicit displays might not be suitable. For example, it’s a socially accepted way to express affection publicly, where actions like passionate kissing could be seen as inappropriate. Hand-holding also comes into play when other romantic gestures are not feasible. While it may not be the most passionate form of physical intimacy, it certainly is one of the most adaptable.

Express passion through kisses. Start kissing early in the relationship and keep it regular. Kissing symbolizes your affection and desire for your partner, so your kisses should be heartfelt. Recall the intense longing you felt during your first kiss with your significant other and aim to capture that same passion each time. Of course, expecting every kiss to be perfect is unrealistic, but that doesn’t mean you should take them lightly or casually. Instead, view kisses as enjoyable moments of fun while also serving as sincere expressions of affection.

Embrace the joy of cuddling. As you and your partner become comfortable in each other’s personal space, cuddling or snuggling would naturally come into play. This act of lounging in each other’s arms is an excellent, often underestimated way to unwind with your partner while enhancing your physical connection.

Participate in activities that promote physical proximity. If you’re uncertain about initiating physical intimacy with your partner, start with small steps. Engaging in activities that necessitate physical closeness is an excellent way to gradually become comfortable with showing physical affection. This can also serve as a springboard for other forms of physical interaction. Consider watching a movie while cuddled up together, sharing a roller coaster ride, riding a motorcycle, swimming together, or any other activity that encourages closeness. Even just sitting in a way that your legs touch can be a simple yet meaningful gesture of affection. Remember, every journey begins with a single step!

Make it a habit to go to bed together. While it might seem quite straightforward, the pressures of work and parenting often prevent couples from sharing the same bedtime. Going to bed together isn’t just about physical intimacy, but it’s also an opportunity to share personal thoughts with your partner, strengthening the intimate bond between you. Many of a couple’s most sincere, open conversations occur in bed, as it’s usually a time when privacy is assured. Foregoing this special time means missing out on a valuable opportunity for both physical and emotional closeness. If your schedule doesn’t permit you to share the same bedtime with your partner, try to at least spend some time together in bed, perhaps before your partner gets up. Also, establish a signal for when your partner is “in the mood”, ensuring that you’re there with them when it matters most.

Related Reading: 9 Bedtime Rituals That Will Make Your Relationship Stronger

Master the art of massage. Massages serve as a wonderful display of affection, a technique for foreplay, and a means to connect with your partner. You might want to use a neutral oil like grapeseed oil, particularly if you or your partner are prone to allergies. If not, consider using a fragrant lotion or oil, which could be more appealing to some. Both pleasant sensations and aromas can induce relaxation and arousal. Giving and receiving touch are equally significant, so learn to do both. If you find it challenging to relax during a massage without getting ticklish, consider doing some light exercise or soaking in a hot tub prior to the massage.

Engage in joint workouts. Regular exercise not only enhances body positivity but also elevates the level of sexual contentment in a relationship. Even a 30-minute daily workout can significantly reduce stress and promote mental health. Such physical activities can enhance the satisfaction couples derive from their relationship. Exercising together provides additional time to bond and playfully compete, or exchange enticing glances until the tension spills over into the bedroom.

Intimate Dining Experiences: Prepare a meal together and enjoy it in a cozy setting at home. This shared activity promotes collaboration and creates opportunities for physical closeness, like brushing against each other in the kitchen or feeding each other bites of food.

Regular Compliments: Regularly expressing admiration for each other can boost self-esteem and feelings of attractiveness, making both partners more comfortable with physical intimacy.

Prioritize Quality Time: Dedicate time to just be together, whether that’s watching a movie, cuddling, or simply talking. This uninterrupted time deepens your emotional connection, laying a solid foundation for physical intimacy.

Implementing these activities requires patience and understanding. Remember, developing intimacy is a journey, not a destination. Enjoy the process of getting to know each other deeply and fostering a strong bond.

Related Reading: 20 Mind-Blowing Intimacy Hacks For Your Relationship

Commonly Asked Questions

What does physical intimacy encompass?

Physical intimacy, at its core, refers to the close, physical contact between two individuals. However, it goes beyond just sexual activity and includes a broad spectrum of actions that communicate affection, love, and connection. It encompasses everything from holding hands and hugging to cuddling and kissing and more intimate acts like sexual intercourse.

Different types of physical intimacy play a significant role in establishing and maintaining the bond between couples. Non-sexual physical touch is often overlooked but is just as important as sexual intimacy. Everyday gestures like a pat on the back, a quick kiss goodbye, or holding hands while walking can help couples feel connected and loved.

Physical touch is a powerful tool for communication. It can express a range of emotions, from love and affection to comfort and reassurance. For many people, physical intimacy fulfills their need for personal connection, making them feel secure and valued in their relationship.

Maintaining a physically intimate relationship requires ongoing effort and communication. Open dialogue about each partner’s needs, desires, and boundaries is crucial. Each person should feel comfortable expressing their comfort level and any concerns they may have regarding physical intimacy. This negotiation ensures that both parties needs are met and that physical intimacy is a positive, consensual experience.

Some signs that a couple may need help in reconnecting physically include less frequent physical contact, avoidance of intimacy, or feeling uncomfortable with touch. These issues could stem from various factors, such as stress, health issues, or unresolved conflicts.

Counseling can be an effective tool in addressing these challenges. A professional counselor or therapist can facilitate open and honest communication between partners, helping them understand each other’s needs and find ways to reconnect physically.

They can provide strategies for improving physical intimacy, such as setting aside dedicated time for each other, engaging in shared activities, or practicing mindfulness techniques. Counseling can also help partners navigate any emotional issues that may be hindering physical intimacy, fostering a stronger overall connection.

How is physical intimacy cultivated?

Physical intimacy is cultivated through a combination of trust, communication, and shared experiences. Here’s how:

Building Trust: The foundation of physical intimacy is trust. It’s crucial that both individuals feel safe and secure with each other. This trust is built over time through consistent actions, honesty, and transparency.

Related Reading: How To Build Trust In A Relationship

Open Communication: Open and honest communication is key to understanding each other’s comfort levels, desires, and boundaries when it comes to physical intimacy. It’s important to have ongoing discussions about what you both enjoy, what makes you uncomfortable, and any changes in your feelings toward physical intimacy.

Shared Experiences: Engaging in activities together can help foster physical intimacy. These could be as simple as cooking a meal together, taking a walk, or watching a movie. During these shared experiences, opportunities for casual touch – like holding hands or hugging – can often naturally arise, helping to build physical intimacy.

Related Reading: Why Doing Things Together Builds Intimacy

Expressing Affection: Regular expressions of affection, both verbal and non-verbal, can also enhance physical intimacy. This might include saying “I love you”, giving compliments, or engaging in small acts of physical affection like a kiss goodbye or a gentle touch on the arm.

Understanding and Respecting Boundaries: Everyone has different comfort levels when it comes to physical touch. It’s important to understand and respect these boundaries. Physical intimacy should always be consensual and never forced.

Creating a Comfortable Environment: The environment can play a big role in physical intimacy. Creating a comfortable, relaxing, and private space can make physical closeness more enjoyable and less stressful.

Cultivating physical intimacy is a gradual process that requires patience, understanding, and mutual effort. It’s about creating a deep connection that goes beyond just physical touch.

Why Is Physical Intimacy Significant For A Man?

Physical intimacy is significant for a man for several reasons:

• Emotional Connection: Physical intimacy often expresses love and affection, helping build an emotional connection with their partner. It’s a non-verbal way of communicating feelings.

• Validation: Men, like anyone else, need validation. Physical intimacy can provide reassurance about their desirability and the health of their relationship.

   Recommended Reading: Show Your Man You Value and Respect Him with 56 Empowering Affirmations   

• Stress Relief: Physical intimacy, especially sex, has been shown to reduce stress levels. It triggers the release of endorphins and other hormones that create feelings of happiness, relaxation, and contentment.

• Bonding: Oxytocin, often referred to as the “love hormone”, is released during moments of physical intimacy. This hormone plays a significant role in bonding and creating a sense of closeness between partners.

• Health Benefits: Regular physical intimacy, including sex, has numerous health benefits such as improved heart health, better sleep, and boosted immunity.

    Recommended Reading: How a Man Falls in Love

Remember, while physical intimacy is important, it’s only one facet of a relationship.

Conclusion

Physical intimacy is a key ingredient to a thriving and fulfilling relationship. It’s not just about the act itself, but the deeper connection, trust, and mutual understanding it fosters between partners.

As you embark on your journey to unlock the secrets of deeper physical intimacy, remember that open communication, respect for boundaries, and a genuine desire to understand your partner’s needs are paramount.

Apply these insights to your relationship, and watch as it transforms and deepens in ways you never thought possible. So go ahead, unlock the door to deeper physical intimacy, and experience the profound bond it can create. Remember, every journey begins with a single step. Let this be yours.