Ever wondered, “What does Jesus say about divorce?” Well, here’s the answer.
Divorce is no longer a disease contracted only by Hollywood movie stars. People from all walks of life, including Christians, are affected by divorce. There is hardly a Christian family that, directly or indirectly, does not know the pain of divorce.
One reason why more Christians are getting divorced is that many now see marriage as a legal agreement defined by societal rules rather than a sacred promise blessed by God. Instead of committing to stay faithful “till death do us part,” some couples opt for a more modern vow, promising to stay together “as long as we both shall love.”
Related Reading: How Does God View Marriage
The new “no-fault” divorce law has made ending marriages so simple that some lawyers advertise certificate of divorce services for less than $100.00, claiming, “All legal fees and services included in one low price.” It’s a regrettable reflection of how easily marriage is treated nowadays.
What God joined together, some separate for less than the cost of good shoes.
We’re in a time of change, where traditional values are questioned inside and outside the church. It’s like they’ve been uprooted, tossed into the air, and are now falling like a tossed salad. The result is that many Christians today are confused and do not know what to believe, especially in the area of divorce and remarriage.
Here are recent questions we’ve received:
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Are there reasons in the Bible for divorce and remarriage?
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Do you commit adultery when you remarry?
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Why do some denominations let divorced individuals join but not let their ministers marry divorced people?
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Is it better to endure the pain of divorce or the sadness of a loveless marriage?
- Is divorce better than staying in an unhealthy marriage? (We go in depth on this question here)
This blog. will answer the question: what does the Bible say about divorce?
The Current Challenge
Pastors, teachers, and Christian writers sometimes add to the confusion about a certificate of divorce and remarriage with different interpretations of important Bible passages. Some say, like the Pharisees of old, that the Bible permits divorce and remarriage for “every cause,” while others insist that God hates divorce and prohibits divorce and remarriage in any situation.
The reason for these conflicting views is that many interpret the Bible based more on their personal experiences rather than on a careful study of what the Bible actually says about issuing a certificate of divorce.
Not to mention, the time of cultural transition and confusion in which we live offers unprecedented opportunities to avoid, steer clear of, or massage Biblical truths that answer the questions that Christians are asking.
We must not allow the extremes of progressive politics to impede our understanding and application of what the Bible teaches on the crucial subject of divorce and remarriage affecting so many lives.
Where Did Divorce Come From?
“God Originated Divorce”- Have you heard this saying?
Chances are you have probably heard pastors and leaders say this. In reality, the origins of divorce are unclear. According to the Bible, unlike marriage, divorce wasn’t established by God. The Bible doesn’t suggest that God introduced divorce after the Fall as part of His plan for human society.
Divorce is a human creation, not something God commanded. It goes against God’s initial plan for marriages to be unbreakable. Jesus clarified this when discussing divorce, saying that it wasn’t part of God’s original design, as he stated, “from the beginning it was not so” (Matthew 19:8).
Jesus pointed out that Moses (not the Lord) “allowed” divorce due to the “hardness” of human hearts (Matt 19:8). Allowing a practice isn’t the same as starting it. When a certificate of divorce is first mentioned in the Bible, it was already happening.
What Part Did God Actually Play With Divorce?
What God did through Moses was set rules for divorce to avoid its misuse. This doesn’t imply God overlooked divorce; it means He recognized its existence and put rules in place to stop a bad situation from getting worse.
The absence of a specific law in the Pentateuch forbidding divorce reflects God’s practical view of human shortcomings. It demonstrates God’s readiness to work towards redemption for those who fall short of His ideal for them.
What Does The Old Testament Say About Divorce
Before delving into how God’s views on divorce in the Old Testament relate to us today, let’s take a look at the clearest Old Testament passages about divorce.
Moses Addresses Divorce
Before Moses gave the law, divorce was widespread among non-Israelite nations. A man could end his marriage for any reason by simply stating in front of witnesses, “You are no longer my wife.”
As a result the divorced woman had no choice but to leave her home, carrying only a few belongings on her back. That’s why women wore all their rings, jewelry, and coins on them – these items served as a financial resource in case of divorce.
Easy divorce became a regular thing among the Hebrews because there were no rules against it. Men would divorce their wives to partake in sexual immorality (“quick fun”) and then would want their wives back whenever they missed them or wanted their help with the house or children.
This is why we find legislation about divorce in Deuteronomy 24:1-4.
Deuteronomy 24:1-4, NIV: If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the Lord. Do not bring sin upon the land the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance.
The main goal of the law is to discourage quick divorce by restricting remarriage after it. The law has three parts:
(1) the reasons for divorce Deuteronomy 24:1a
(2) the divorce procedure Deuteronomy 24:1b
(3) the outcome of divorce Deuteronomy24:2-4
(1) Reasons For Divorce In The Old Testament
“If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce . . .” Deuteronomy 24:1a
Note that the law does not prescribe or encourage divorce. It simply assumes the course of action a husband would take if his wife commits adultery, is sexually immoral or she became “displeasing to him.”
The exact meaning of this phrase is unclear, and there was a strong difference in how rabbis interpreted it. The Shammai school, Bet Shammai, saw it as unchastity (sexually immoral), while the Hillel school, Bet Hillel, considered it anything that displeased the husband.
Unfortunately, neither of these two views are supported by pieces of evidence.
Shammai’s belief is proven wrong because in the Old Testament, divorce wasn’t allowed for adultery (see verses below):
Leviticus 20:10, NIV: If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife—with the wife of his neighbor—both the adulterer and the adulteress are to be put to death.
Deuteronomy 22:28-29, NIV If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered,he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives.
Both these verses suggests that the “indecency/ displeasing” in Deuteronomy 24:1 must refer to something other than sexual immorality or sexual uncleanness.
Hillel’s interpretation is also proven wrong because of the following:
The Hebrew word erwath (usually translated as “indecency” or “uncleanness”) is commonly used to talk about the shameful exposure of the human body (Genesis 9:21-23; Exodus 20:26; Lamentations 1:8; Ezekial 16:36-37).
Hence if we use Hillel’s interpretation, we can infer that divorce was permitted for some form of shameful or indecent behavior other than sexual immorality.
(2) The Process of Divorce In The Old Testament
To divorce his wife, a man had to follow a specific process: he had to write a divorce document and give it to her, as mentioned in Deuteronomy 24:1. The document likely had a wording similar to the one typically used by Jews in the Diaspora, which reads:
“On the ______ day of the week, the ______ day of the month ______, in the year ______ from the creation of the world, in the city of ______, I, ______, the son of ______, do willingly consent, being under no restraint, to release, to set free, and to put aside thee, my wife, ______, daughter of ______, who has been my wife from before. Thus I do set free, release thee, and put thee aside, in order that thou may have permission and the authority over thyself and to go and marry any man that thou may desire. No person may hinder thee from this day onward, and thou art permitted to every man. This shall be for thee from me a bill of dismissal, a letter of release, and a document of freedom, in accordance with the laws of Moses and Israel. ______ the son of ______, witness. ______ the son of ______, witness.”
The bill of divorce served several purposes.
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It stopped the husband from acting hastily and carelessly in dismissing his wife.
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It confirmed that the married woman was no longer bound to the husband who sent her away.
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It also safeguarded the woman’s reputation, whether she married someone else or would remain unmarried.
Moses’ divorce process wasn’t a permission slip to easily get rid of a wife. It was a strict requirement, making sure that anyone divorcing his wife had to prove she wasn’t at fault for misconduct but was divorced for a minor reason.
It’s essential to understand that Moses didn’t insist that a man must divorce his wife if he found “some indecency” in her. He allowed it because the hearts of the Israelites were hard, as mentioned in the following bible verses: Matthew 19:8 and Mark 10:5, rejecting God’s original plan for marriage (Mark 10:9; Gen 2:24).
What Moses required was to write a divorce document, aiming to discourage quick divorces and ease the difficulties of divorce. Even after giving the divorce document, there was still a chance for reconciliation as long as the woman didn’t marry someone else.
(3) The Result of Divorce In The Old Testament
The primary purpose of the divorce procedure was to close the door forever for the man to remarry his former wife:
Deuteronomy 24:2-4, NIV: and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the Lord. Do not bring sin upon the land the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance.
The key idea of this law is to forbid a man from marrying his ex-wife again if she married someone else. Even if her second husband dies or divorced her, she couldn’t go back to her first husband. Doing so would be an “abomination before the Lord” (Deut 24:4), considered as bad as fornication.
The reason behind this is that if a husband could easily marry the same woman again, divorce could turn into a “legal” way to commit adultery. Later prophetic writings confirm this idea presented by Moses:
The prophet Jeremiah says: If a man divorces his wife and she leaves him and marries another man, should he return to her again? Would not the land be completely defiled? But you have lived as a prostitute with many lovers— would you now return to me?” declares the Lord. Jeremiah 3:1, NIV
Another reason for the Deuteronomic rule against divorcees remarrying each other after one has married someone else could be that such a marriage might be seen as incestuous. Leviticus 18 tells us that before the Israelite conquest, the Canaanites had “defiled” the land with “incest” (Leviticus 18:25-26).
With this link in mind, one might say that Deuteronomy forbids a divorced couple from remarrying if one of them has married someone else, as it would be considered incestuous. How?
Well, the first marriage created a blood connection, making them not just husband and wife but also kin. So, if they divorced and then got remarried, it was like a marriage between a brother and sister (hence: 31 “It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32 But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery).
If this reasoning is accurate, then Deuteronomy 24 aligns with Genesis 1 and 2, emphasizing that divorce cannot sever the bond formed by marriage. It’s essential to highlight that what the Mosaic law strongly disapproves of is not the remarriage of a divorced woman but her remarriage to her first husband after the end of her second marriage.
This implies that in the Old Testament, getting married again wasn’t seen as adulterous, and a woman who remarried wasn’t considered an adulteress. Unlike adultery, the Pentateuch didn’t demand the death penalty for a divorced woman and her second husband. This should make us careful before labeling remarriage as adulterous.
Conclusion on Divorce In The Old Testament
With this backdrop and context, we can conclude that Moses didn’t introduce divorce, nor was it endorsed as an inherent right of the husband. Deuteronomy 24:1-4 shows that Moses aimed to limit the harm of divorce by mandating the husband to give a divorce document to protect his wife after she marries someone else.
The Mosaic accommodation doesn’t change God’s original intention for marriage to be a sacred, lasting covenant. It merely offers protection for the divorced wife when sinful actions deviate from God’s original plan for marriage.
What Does Jesus & The New Testament Say About Divorce
Understanding Jesus’ teachings is crucial when exploring the Biblical perspective on divorce and remarriage. Jesus clarifies why the Old Testament allowed certain concessions (Deut 24:1) and reaffirms that God’s original plan for marriage is a lasting and unbreakable covenant.
The two major bible verses containing the teaching of Jesus on divorce and remarriage are found in Mark 10:1-12 and Matthew 19:1-12. Both bible verses report the same incident and are placed in the same geographical setting.
Jesus replied. 6 “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ 7 ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8 and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” 10 When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this. 11 He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. 12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.”
Matthew 19
8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” 10 The disciples said to him, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.”
Understanding The Difference Between The Two Passages
Both passages record the same questions asked by the Pharisees and the same response given by Christ. (In spite of the essential similarities, there is one crucial difference between the two passages, namely the exception found in Matthew 19:9, which teaches that divorce and remarriage “except for fornication” is adultery.)
Jesus’s Response To The Pharisees
In Mark 10:1-12 and Matthew 19:1-12, the Pharisees inquire about divorce. Jesus quickly points out God’s initial intention for marriage, rebuking them for not recognizing that divorce goes against this plan. The original plan is for a man and a woman to be so closely connected in marriage that they become one flesh (see bible verses: Genesis 2:26; Matthew 19:6; Mark 10:8).
The closeness of the “one flesh” unity is portrayed in a couple’s children, who inherit traits from both parents, making the two inseparable. Jesus emphasizes that God is the one who brings a couple together in marriage, and what God has joined together, no one has the right to separate them.
It’s important to note that when the Pharisees asked if it’s lawful to divorce, Christ responded by affirming the lasting nature of the marriage union established by God.
This response, however, led the Pharisees to ask another question: “Then why did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce and to put her away?” (Matt 19:7).
The Pharisees Challenge Of Jesus’s View
With their follow-up question, the Pharisees seemed to challenge Christ’s stance, suggesting that Moses did, in fact, command divorce. They argued along these lines: If marriage, according to its original setup, is an unbreakable union not to be dissolved by human authority, then why did Moses command divorce? Doesn’t your teaching conflict with Moses’ command?
Christ’s response is crucial as it clears up the entire matter of the Old Testament Mosaic provision. He said to them, “Moses allowed you to divorce your wives because of your hard hearts, but from the beginning, it was not like that” (Matthew 19:8).
The expression “because of the hardness of your hearts” suggests that the disobedience and stubbornness of the Israelites prompted the Mosaic allowance. This, however, didn’t negate the initial idea of marriage as an enduring union. The divorce document was meant to manage a problematic situation, not to cancel the divine institution of two becoming one flesh!
Conclusion- What Does The Bible Say About Marriage
We can conclude 4 things based on all the bible verses that we examined:
1. The Bible says that marriage is eternal and everlasting.
2. God ordained the marriage, what God has joined together no man can separate.
3. However, because God understands our sinful nature, He guided Moses to bring order to what people were already doing.
4. God hates divorce.
However, ultimately, the teaching of Jesus in Mark and Luke makes no allowance for divorce and remarriage by either the husband or the wife, while Matthew makes the exception if one commits adultery. What we can infer from Jesus is that marriage was not a mere civil contract that can be terminated but a divinely established covenant relationship.
